College dating statistivs
As financial reporter and author of Date-Onomics: How Dating Became a Lopsided Numbers Game, Jon Birger puts it, “It’s not that He’s Just not That Into You. If you’re a single, college-educated woman in Manhattan, the cards of love are stacked in favor of you remaining single—but it has nothing to do with texting a guy too soon or (not) sleeping with someone on a third date.It’s not a strategic problem, it’s a demographic problem.”In fact, the dating advice that is offered up in Date-Onomics runs refreshingly against the courtship narratives that are most restrictive for women.For example, even in 2015, women are still often expected to “play hard to get” and “let men take the lead.” Women who don’t demurely wait to be fawned over are often branded as “desperate” or “pathetic.”Birger counters these women are not, in fact, desperate.Birger points to a relatively overlooked book, Too Many Women?: The Sex Ratio Question, which was written by professors Marcia Guttentag and Paul Secord, and published in 1983.One woman recalls a boyfriend who felt entitled to grope her friend right in front of her because he thought he deserved a threesome.Then there’s Jason Hendriks, the pseudonym given to a 34-year-old on the Upper East Side of Manhattan who is a “little pudgy and not the world’s sharpest dresser,” by Birger’s account.
In the hands of a patronizing writer, or worse, a smug married person, Data-Onomics content would be hard to digest.
He crunches data from the National Center for Education Statistics (and includes very helpful charts in the appendix) showing that 1981 was the last year that more men than women graduated from a four-year undergraduate program.
Not for nothing are there 39 percent more women ages 22 to 29 with college degrees in Manhattan than men in the same bracket, with a gap of 100,000 between female and male college degree holders under the age of 35 in the entire city.
Hendrik not only engages in the delights of not texting one-night-stands and ditching women who don’t immediately agree to have sex with him, but also loves playing women off each other by insulting others to manipulate them into feeling special.
In short, he is a total asshole who plays off the insecurity of the numbers games to solely satiate his sexual desires.
These men have the problem—or, really, the luxury—of the “paradox of choice.” It’s harder to commit to just one lady because they believe another woman will always be a little better.“If they had a girlfriend they liked, but someone else came along who was a little smarter or prettier, a little more this or that, it was easier for them to call it quits because they had other options,” Birger explains.